T. R. Smith, comp. Poetica Erotica: Rare and Curious Amatory Verse. 1921–22.
The Maids Complaint
Bagford Ballads(Anonymous, 1680; from Pt. III) YOUNG men give ear to me awhile, | |
If you to merriment are inclined, | |
And I’ll tell you a story shall make you smile, | |
Of late done by a woman kind; | |
And as she went musing all alone, | 5 |
I heard her to sigh, to sob and make moan, | |
For a dill done, dill done, dill done done, | |
Quoth she, I’m undone it I haven’t a dill done. | |
For I am a maid and a very good maid, | |
And sixteen years of age am I, | 10 |
And fain would I part with my Maidenhead, | |
If any good fellow would with me lie; | |
But none to me ever proffered such love | |
As to lie by my side and give me a shove | |
With his dill done, etc. | 15 |
O happy were I, etc. | |
At night when I do go to bed | |
Thinking for to take my rest, | |
Strange fancies come into my head, | |
I pray for that which I love best: | 20 |
For it is a comfort, and pleasure doth bring | |
To women that hath such a pretty fine thing, | |
Called a will done, etc. | |
Then happy were I, etc. | |
Last week I walked in the Strand, | 25 |
I met with my sister, a handsome lass, | |
I kindly took her by the hand, | |
This question of her I did ask: | |
Whether she kept still a maiden alone, | |
Or whether her maidenhead was fled or gone, | 30 |
For a dill done, etc. | |
O happy were I, etc. | |
II. Kind sister, quoth she, to tell you the truth, | |
It has gone this twelve months day; | |
I freely gave it to a handsome youth, | 35 |
That used with me to sport and play: | |
To grieve for the loss of it I never shall, | |
If I had ten thousand I could give ’em all | |
For a dill done, etc. | |
O happy were I, etc. | 40 |
She making this answer, I bid her adieu, | |
And told her I could no longer stay, | |
I let go her hand, and I straight left the Strand, | |
And to Covent-Garden I hasted away: | |
Where lively young gallants do use to resort, | 45 |
To pick up young lasses and show ’em fine sport | |
With his dill done, etc. | |
Oh, happy were I, etc. | |
I would I’d a sweet heart, as some maids have | |
That little know how to pleasure a man, | 50 |
I’d keep him frolicsome, gallant and brave, | |
And make as much on him as any one can: | |
Before any good thing he should lack | |
I’d sell all my coats, and smock from my back | |
For his dill done, etc. | 55 |
Then happy were I, etc. | |
Thus young men I have declared in brief | |
The cause of my sorrow and woe, | |
And if any of you will yield me relief | |
Speak cheerfully to me, say yea or no: | 60 |
I live at the Sign of the Cup and the Can, | |
And will be loving to any young man | |
For his dill done, etc. | |
And all my, etc. | |
Besides, young men, I have store of money, | 65 |
Good red gold and silver bright, | |
And he shall be master of every penny, | |
That marries with me and yields me delight. | |
For why t’other night I heard my dame Nancy | |
Declare how her master did tickle her fancy | 70 |
With his dill done, etc. | |
Then come to me, my bonny lad | |
While I am in my prime, I pray | |
And take a good bargain while it is to be had, | |
And do not linger your time away. | 75 |
’Tis money, you see, makes many a man rich: | |
Then come along, rut on the place that doth itch | |
For a dill done, dill done, dill done done, | |
Take all my money, and give me a dill done. | |